Staying On My Mat

I have a new not so guilty pleasure… Yin Yoga. Look it up. Do it. It’s life changing.

So… the nutshell of Yin is that you hold poses for 3 to 5 minutes but they are slightly different than traditional yoga poses and they focus on the tendons, faschia, and ligaments – thereby releasing a shit-ton of garbage from around the joints and increasing flexibility. It also improves the flow of qi which can improve organ health, immunity, and emotional well-being.

What I am learning is how much garbage (baggage) and emotion I have been storing in my body… Not just the last 4 years.. for always.. I am so excited to see the path of healing it all from head to toe with this practice.

So, at my last session we were in a very uncomfortable hip opener… I mean it was “zingy” and the instructor said that sometimes this practice is like life… we have to stay in discomfort to get where we need to go. Cue the tears; the last 4 years have been all about staying despite the discomfort. When your children are involved you don’t have much choice. However, my unhappiness, and fear, and broken-heart energy had to go somewhere and I stored it – deep in my guts and my hips and my heart. All of it wrapped around everything authentically me and literally suffocated my poor shattered soul.
I stayed.

My precious baby girl was diagnosed with a life-shortening illness;
I stayed.
My heart was broken – to be robbed of a “normal” life;
I stayed.
Everything was affected, my friends, my work, my money, my body, my spirit;
I stayed.
My marriage was very nearly destroyed;
I stayed.
I was on my mat, opening my hips, throbbing with electric pain;
I stayed.

stay

There is a pride that comes with weathering a storm, facing it, letting it tear you down so you can re-build. There is a quiet strength and exhilaration that comes from finding the tools to re-build and re-inspire yourself to live up to the path your soul intended.

I have done many things in my life that give me great pride but right now my heart bursts with so much love and sense of self because I stayed. Namaste.

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