Have you had a chance to see “Adele Live at Royal Albert Hall”…. please do, I mean, if you like her music.  She is such a breath of fresh air, funny, vulnerable, genuine… and well, that girl can sing!


Throughout the concert she is genuinely amazed at what a dream come true it is to be on that stage… she saw the Spice Girls there after all!  One particular moment that stands out to me are the words she shares before performing “Someone Like You”… the basic gist is that she wrote the song about an ex-boyfriend and ironically it is the song that skyrocketed her career…. one of the lyrics is “who would have known how bittersweet this would taste….”  As she sings this you can see that these words move her and I identified so strongly with that.


Rowan’s diagnosis with Cystic Fibrosis has forced me to examine myself in a way that I seriously had to dig deep, seriously had to analyze the person I was before and the person that I want to be. At the very worst of it, I wanted to lay down and give up… she picked the wrong mama for this job… but of course, I knew that wasn’t true.  But it was more than that, it’s reminding me everyday that this is it – this is the shot – there are no do-overs – especially when it comes to parenting and I want to raise strong, independent, “you CAN make your dreams come true” women.


Of course for me, it IS bittersweet… would I have got here without CF… I really don’t think so.  I think we would have had a lovely little life but in a sort of backwards way I am grateful… I am grateful for the lessons that my 5 year old is already learning.. she wants to make necklaces to “raise money to help Rowan”, I am grateful for this pressure I feel to live authentically and with some urgency, I am grateful that while initially CF tore my husband and I apart it has slammed us back together closer than we have ever been – loving each other and respecting each other – just for being so strong to have weathered this storm together. And I am proud of that, I am proud of me, I am proud of us…. and  so excited about our future…bittersweetness and all!


click the pic to listen! you won’t regret it!


10 thoughts on “Bittersweet

  1. Love your vulnerability and passion in all your posts! CF teaches us to love unconditionally and brave the storms. Nothing can break us down!! That doesn’t mean we don’t have pains along the way. Another song that struck me like a brick was “Who Says” by Selena Gomez – who says our CF girls can’t do ANYTHING in this world!

    • Thanks so much for commenting Charlotte! I agree… that’s the world I want my girls to live in. I’ll have to look that song up – my girls aren’t old enough to make me listen to Selena Gomez, lol!

  2. Wonderful job, yet again, my friend! I hope in your new journey you are able to find the peace and contentment you desire. I am here for you too, when you need to vent or just want to talk about the changes. Take care.

  3. Kelly,
    So many times we do not see or understand that the shit that happens in our life happens for a reason. There is a lesson in all of this. A test of your strength, a journey to your best self. You are never alone even in your darkest moments.
    i am so excited for this new leg of your journey. it shows that you have passion and are on purpose!

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