I Tore Up The Past Instead!

I did it – as promised -I burned up the past ! Well, truthfully, I ripped into a hundred tiny pieces and threw it in the garbage….I had 2 choices-  burn up the past while the girls are awake or wait until they are asleep.  I didn’t think “burning up the past” was exactly the most fire-safe example to set for my kids and it’s the dead of winter and turned very cold again and I am way too big of a pussy to stand out in the cold if I don’t have to – even if I have a tiny fire to keep me warm.

 

Oh that felt good!!! Oh so very, very good! Quite frankly, the past is very embarrassing.. at least my darkest past.  Like I have said many times before I have always lived in a perpetual state of fear and reading about the ridiculous fears I had 10 years ago … if time-travel was possible I would send a metaphorical back in time bitch-slap to my silly whiny little self.  Just as I am fortunate now I was fortunate then

but just too afraid to see it.

 

My past is a true testament of the Law of Attraction…. I spent a life living in fear and the Universe gave me something to REALLY be afraid of… a child with a chronic, degenerative disease that has no cure L

 

That’s where this new name “Finding Fearless” comes from… in my darkest of dark days in dealing with Rowan’s diagnosis I realized that I didn’t want to live a life in Fear… I didn’t want to raise children in an environment of fear. I didn’t want Rowan to feel bad that her condition causes me debilitating fear.

 

Do I still have silly little fears? Of course I do but it’s much easier to check myself now… much easier to have a healthy grasp on perspective.  So excited to REALLY work on putting my FEAR behind me, my INSECURITY to rest…  time to LIVE IN THE MOMENT ONCE AND FOR ALL!!

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2 thoughts on “I Tore Up The Past Instead!

  1. What a read! I love that it appears you write like you talk, you don’t put up a front in your blog. This is how I write to-just like I talk. No professional speech like chatter-it’s all real and that I like. It is easier to connect (well at least for me it is) when you know someone is being ‘real’. No fronts. No false advertisement. Just straight out ‘real’. I’m also just taking on many new things & trying to make my dreams come true and it’s hard, it’s scary, I have two kids and I’m a broke woman BUT I feel that if I can keep working at my dreams, screw the rest of the crap, that in the end it will pay off for me & my family. Scared-you better believe your pretty little face I am but DETERMINED> Amen!

    • I had to take a second to figure out if I knew you personally, ’cause I totally write like I talk…. couldn’t imagine doing it any other way! Thanks for checking out and commenting!

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